Last night I went to the teachers drinking dinner party for one of my schools, here in Japan, and I saw some of the teachers actually smoking at the restaurant. I realized that I had a certain image of them that was really not who they really were. I realized that they felt comfortable enough at the dinner to whip out their dirty little habit and light it up for all to take a whiff of.
Today is Sunday and because I woke up at 12:30pm, and then got out of bed at 1:00pm, I decided that I wouldn't be making it to church today. Instead I'm at home, making a sad effort to clean and tidy up my mess of an "appaato" (apartment) and I am listening to Amy Poehler's autobiography in audiobook format. (Perhaps that's why I feel the need to be incredibly sassy in the blog post.)
I got to thinking about the dinners I have with the peeps from Every Nation Yokohama Church and I thought about how I always feel the pressure to keep myself in check and to make sure that I keep up a polite Christian image. I can't say any cheeky sexual jokes (which I throughly enjoy), and if I order an alcoholic beverage I need to remember that I'll probably get the side-eye glances from my neighboring Christian brethren. Sure there are a few people who I know are just as blasé as I am, and really wouldn't mind it if I let all my junk-in-the-trunk hang out, but sadly they are not the only people at those dinners.
I just find it sad that I feel this way, and that other people feel the need to put on a show for me and the other folks around.
