Today, I did an American culture lesson with my students, where they learned about New Years celebrations in America. I showed them a few pictures of how Americans celebrate New Years and one of the pictures showed people doing a toast with glasses of champagne. I would have never showed a picture of an alcoholic beverage if I was teaching in an American elementary school but because the perception of alcohol in Japan is very different compared to back home, I was sure that it wouldn't be a problem even if they discussed it.
The Japanese don't consider drinking alcohol a negative thing in at all. Some people even think that if you don't drink, you are a bit strange. The drinking of alcohol is so much so accepted, that they even show adults in cartoons drinking alcohol.
Anyways, during the lesson the homeroom teacher was asked to talk about Japanese New Years traditions and then compare them to American traditions. In one of my more rowdy classes the teacher pointed out the toasting picture and (remember that I don't fully understand their language yet but...) I think he asked them if they drink a little bit of alcohol to celebrate the New Years.
He even made a gesture of drinking a little bit out of his hand. I was guessing that that's what he would do with his kids. But some of the kids said yes, they do taste some alcohol during the celebration, which wasn't surprising to me.
I once heard of my co-worker going to a hot spring that was infused with ume (sour plumb) alcohol and people could order countless ume drinks and even pour it into the water. He went on to tell me that there were a few kids that were actually drinking the water that they were bathing in and some drunk men began to pour their drinks into their mouths, after being asked by the kids, and the kids parents thought it was quite funny and clapped their hands to show their amusement to what was happening.
Anyways, what actually shocked me was when one child said that he sometimes drinks "kodomo biiru" (children's beer). I was like WWHHHAAAAATTT! That's a real thing?!!! And apparently it is. I guess the alcohol companies know how to start them off young.
Watch these kids. They be acting crazy in the beginning in the video and they're not even drunk yet.
Yesterday, I went to Harajuku, Japan for the first time and had a few hours to kill, so I just decided to get lost. It was the best! Japan is AMAZING! I love it. From the fashion, to the food, to the historical sites; Japan has so much to experience and see.
I've heard of the popular Lolita style in Japan, but yesterday I came across a whole row of stores that specialized in the Lolita sub-culture. And what did I find? Steampunk Lolita clothing and accessories!!! It was amazing how perfectly these two styles meshed together. I absolutely loved it!
Sometimes, I feel like this when I go to church. I think, that's the reason why it's difficult to go to a big church, because people already have their groups and unless someone feels the obligation, no one might reach out and talk to you. But then I think that this is perhaps a spiritual battle as well, where the isolation really isn't coming from other people but the idea is actually coming from something that is happening in my own mind.
But it comes down to this... I need to put myself out there if I am to make friends, so I do, even if it's difficult, I do it anyways and hope for the best. Thankfully, it seems that many people who attend the church I am going to now, are fairly good at reaching out to people and helping them feel welcomed. I am very grateful to the people who have reached out to me, and invited me to events, because if they didn't I wouldn't be able to make any friends or become connected to other Christians.
I hope that I can be they type of person that reaches out to the outsiders. I hope that I am the person who keeps his eyes out for people who need to be included and welcomed. I hope that I am the person that helps connect people to the Kingdom of God.
- Pastor Rick Warren, author of A Purpose Driven Life
In Japan, they have the phrase "Ganbatte!" They say it all the time. It can mean many different things, when translated into English, depending on the situation, but the feeling of the phrase is always the same. It can mean: "Do your best." "Good luck." or as it says above "Give it your all and FIGHT!" I have decided that my next goal I want to pursue is a career in music. I've tried this once before and failed (well, I didn't fail but I just didn't achieve it). But I'm not the kind of person who gives up. My goal in life is to inspire people to dream BIG and to zealously go after their biggest dreams. I wouldn't be following my own advice, if I decided that I should just leave some dreams as simply dreams. That's the main reason why I moved closer to Tokyo. I needed to be in a place where I had access to the entertainment industry. But now that I'm here in Tsujido, I'm having the most difficult time in actually going out to do something in entertainment. I have a few ideas though. I'm thinking about looking into joining a hip hop class near my apartment. I'm also thinking about registering with talent agencies in Tokyo. And ideas, will be what they will continue to be until I take some action on them. But I have these hindering thoughts. Here is a list of the continual jabber I hear whenever I try to do one of those ideas. You're not talented enough. You're not good looking enough. You're not tall enough. You're not confident enough. You're not young enough. You're not... You're not... You're not...
Furthermore, these thoughts are then supported whenever I tell someone about my goal and they give me this look that seems to say, "Really?" But then after hearing all those voices, I hear another voice. I believe that it's the Spirit of God. And this voice tells me, "It doesn't matter if YOU don't think you're good enough. Do it anyways. Even if you don't have faith in yourself." Then I think, "Yeah. It doesn't matter what I think of myself. It doesn't matter if I have self-confidence or not. Because, I don't need to have confidence in myself. I only need to have confidence in God. And if I believe that God brought me thousands of miles to Japan to help me achieve one life long goal, He can surely help me achieve the next. All I need to do is take a step in that direction. It doesn't matter if I think I'm going the right way or if I'm making the right choice. What matters is that I'm taking a step and trusting that the God who brought me this far will continue to bring me to the next place He wants me to be." But then here I sit in my room. Typing this blog post, when I should be figuring out how I'm going to route my trip to Tokyo for interviews with talent agencies, and going to that studio to see if I can enroll in a dance class... I need prayer. I need people to pray for me, even if they don't think that I'm good enough, or good looking enough, or talented enough. They can still pray that God give me the spiritual and physical favor and support to do His will, to do whatever it is that He brought me to Japan to do. Please pray for a boost of energy to get these things done, and for God-given favor to achieve His will.
“Don't be afraid of death; be afraid of an unlived life. You don't have to live forever, you just have to live.”
I was just at the supermarket and I needed to know if I had to
cook a fish before eating it, because it looked like it was already
cooked. But instead of saying, "I'm sorry, I don't speak Japanese," I
think I said, "I'm sorry I'm American."
I'm currently in the process of healing from a little virus, and this makes my job a tiny bit more difficult. My engery level has gone down and my voice is gone and my lungs are filled with mucus and it makes teaching, and communicating very hard.
Today, I felt like all of my classes went pretty well, but the last class of the day is always a struggle. They weren't always last and they weren't always a struggle, but now that they are, I have the most difficult time with them. The worst classes are not the rowdy ones. The worst classes are the ones who don't participate and just sit there the whole time and look at you. I'm pretty sure that the problem isn't me because I did the exact lesson with 3 classes earlier in the day, and they all went very well. It's just because it's the end of the day, and because it takes so much effort to try to pay attention to someone who you can't understand to begin with. It's easier to just sit there quietly and hope the meaningless babble will be over soon.
This always makes me feel like a failure, even though I know I did the lesson exactly the way I did it before. Having a class just look at you and wish it was all over sucks... a lot. It drains the energy out of my body and makes me frustrated and that doesn't help them to want to participate, so the situation just gets worse until i come to the conclusion that I'll just do the lesson and not care if they are paying attention or not. I keep telling myself, "Don't focus on that one difficult class. You did a great job in all the others, and it's totally understandable why they just don't seem interested. You would feel the same way if the roles were switched. You have been in their position before. You know what it's like for them. Don't focus on that one little negative thing, when you've done so much good!"
I once asked my company to contact my schools to get a read on how I am doing. My boss told me that they don't usually do that, and that I'm probably doing fine. What I really wanted to hear was that I'm doing a GOOD job, that people like having me there, and that I'm appreciated. I once had a boss in TN tell me that working with children was just a gift I had. It was very simple and quick, but he was serious and I have taken it to heart. That little comment gave me reassurance for every other time I would get things wrong.
There's this 1st grade boy at one of my schools, let's call him Sasuke, who hugs me every time he sees me. I find myself looking forward to his hugs. He might be the only person who hugs me on a regular basis. Now that I think about it, the hugs from those 1st graders might actually be the reason I'm sick... Oh well.
Now, if you're thinking that the next time you see me you are going to hug me... I'm not sure if that would be the best choice. I usually pull away, initially, when people hug me. I don't know why. I love being hugged. I actually used to put my arms to my chest when friends hugged me, because I liked the feeling of their arms squeezing my whole body. I realized how selfish that was when one of my friends thought that I actually didn't like her hugs because I did that, but then I explained to her that it was just the opposite. I told her that I love to absorb as much of her hug as possible. Then I realized that she wasn't getting the same feelings I was, because I wasn't hugging her back.
But why do I pull away? Hugs are very special to me. For me to let someone hug me feels like I'm giving them a part of me that is vulnerable. I don't like being vulnerable. I don't like being in a position where someone could hurt me. Maybe that's why I pull away. I'm not sure.
I'm not sure if it's a cultural thing in Japan but... I just would love to hear when I did a great job. Because those words just might help me get through days like today.
I've learned that because I'm currently not able to understand what anyone are saying, I have to be able to read their body language and facial expressions. In a way, I'm really liking trying to figure someone out solely by observing their physical behavior, and not being distracted by the words that they are saying but rather getting all my information on them by the way they act. Not only have I been watching the way one particular person acts, but I also watch the bodily responses of the person they are communicating with. I've been learning a lot about culture and about how people view others from doing this.
I recently took one of those buzzfeed personality tests titled "How Good Are You At Reading People" and this was the result. If you click on the picture, it will take you to the test so that you can see how good you are at reading people.
I learned something very difficult for me to adjust to today, about the Japanese culture.
It began with a classroom discussion about how Japanese people don't usually ask people "Why?"
"Why do you like this?" "Why do you feel this way?" "Why do you do this?"
It's because they see it as an invasion of their privacy, or maybe as if they are being asked to reveal more of them self then what they are comfortable with.
Then I remembered learning that Japanese people never ask each other how they are doing. Which is strange because English teachers actually do a whole lesson on "Hello. How are you?"
This was actually something that I came to realize on my own, after trying to be friendly and asking my fellow Japanese co-workers how they are doing in Japanese, which is "Genki desu ka?" (Are you well?) Whenever I asked someone this in Japanese, they would laughed and seem a little uncomfortable, and reply with an automatic "Hai, ganki desu." (Yes, I'm fine.)
Then I connected the dots and realized that not only is it not normal for Japanese people to ask each other how they are doing, but they actually view that as rude as well! I was mortified when I realized this because for one thing, I would try to be friendly toward the principle of my school by every once in a while, going up to his office to say a casual, "Hello. How are you?" (I've tried this in both languages.) And he would always answer me with the appropriate words but never look at me when he answers.
The other very troubling predicament I realized was if I couldn't ask people "How are you?," then what do I say to try to be friendly? What Japanese people normally do is, talk about what the other person is doing, or about the situation at hand, to start conversations. BUT I DON"T SPEAK JAPANESE!!! I became pretty frustrated when I realized this. How was I supposed to be friendly if I couldn't ask people how they are doing (The only way I knew how to be friendly.) and couldn't just start a conversation about anything?
And this is where the story ends. I have no solution. Well I have one solution. Learn to speak Japanese, TJ! But until then, I've got nothing. So... what I think I will continue doing is asking people how they are doing in English, to show that I'm trying to be friendly because it's actually more acceptable when I asking the question in English than in Japanese. And I'll try to just start random conversations, even if I the person I'm talking with can't understand a word I'm saying, and I can't understand a word they are saying to me... Sounds like an awful idea... What do you think?
I have not been able to get this song out of my head for months now. I'm not able to fully understand the lyrics, but it's no matter. I can still recognize a great song when I hear it, even if I can't fully understand the language it's written in. Hata Motohiro's (秦 基博) nation wide hit "Himawari no Yakusoku" (ひまわりの約束) (Sunflower Promise) was the theme song for the 2014 motion picture "Doraemon: Stand By Me." The melody moves like a warm summer breeze, flowing up and down with ease. The vulnerability in Hata's voice makes you want to cry. And if the lyrics are just as heartbreaking as the rough English translation, they should be equally captivating as this song's other beautiful qualities.
I really hope this is true because most of the time, here in Japan, I feel so stupid. Like the other day my Japanese friends were having a very important conversation and then when they all looked at me to get my input I was like, "Uh... I like lamp?... I like... table?" What's even more pathetic is that I don't even actually know the Japanese words for lamp or table, so I didn't even say that.
